Harper doesn't mind if Taliban kill Canadian troops

Sometimes I wonder how the Liberals can resist getting down in the sewer with Harper. How about something like this from Mr. Dion:

Mr. Speaker, Harper accuses me of having more passion for Taliban prisoners than Canadian troops(Harper goes for jugular - again). But the reality is that the government's own actions have put our troops at risk. According to reports, 4 detainees have completely disappeared. Maybe they were tortured or killed. Or maybe they bribed their way to freedom and are now back out killing Canadian troops. Since we're not tracking them we don't know. Harper doesn't seem to care if our troops are being killed or people are being tortured. All he cares about is getting re-elected.

John Baird -- our meat eatin', oil burnin' Environment Minister

Congratulations Mr. Baird, your night out on the town has shown us that you truly take the environment seriously. After all, you may have been caught red handed by a Liberal spy eating at Baton Rouge in Ottawa while his van was outside running -- for two hours (see Jane Taber's Political Notebook in the Globe for more details). But what our intrepid operative didn't know was that Mr. Baird's van actually runs on 85% ethanol and 15% gasoline which makes it perfectly acceptable to leave running.

In fact, it's my understanding that Mr. Baird may have been given special dispensation by his righteous and most honorable leader Mr. Harper. My theory is that Mr. Harper is trying to reign in spending my his Ministers and has given them a per diem. And he has also instructed them to leave their cars running while eating at restaurants in case they exceed their budget and have to make a hasty exit, if you get my meaning. Given this context Mr. Baird's actions seem quite reasonable.

Actually I think, Baird might be onto something bigger. I mean, like me, he's no spring chicken and he doesn't have any kids. So what the hell do we care about what the world looks like in 50 years. Screw the environment, let's live for today! Mr. Baird, if you can pass legislation giving all Canadians a GST rebate for Hummers, you've got my vote in the next election. And if we're all going to have Hummers you better get to work on ramping up oils sands production. And once we're done with the environment maybe you can start working with your old buddy Mr. Flaherty to help us emerging high net wealth families to really get over the top. Thanks a bunch! Hope to hear from you soon.